Odyssey’s hit is playing as we are crossing Czech borders and entering the country I was born and spent most of my life in, yet always struggled to identify as a citizen of.

You see, coming from a mixed family brings a lot of gifts such as learning more languages without the need of studying them, being introduced to more cultures and customs, just as well as it can add another layer of confusion in trying to understand who you are & if there can ever be a place in the world where you will feel at home.

In pure transparency, I never felt Czech even though I was born & grew up in that country.

I never felt Russian even though my mum & other relatives are Russian.

I never really felt either and so I gave up on trying to fit into some particular nationality box, focused on what is beyond nationality & how is it all related to our Soul’s evolution.

Note: One of my favourite writers Karel Capek used to say about himself that he was a cosmopolitan being – I’m okay to go by that too.

Long story short, when being away from Czechia for about 3 years (with an exception of a super-fast visit to my grandad’s funeral that I missed due to a delayed flight, but that’s for another story), I sincerely believed I had no relation to that country as I never felt home sick even once during my time away.

And so, we crossed the borders and I didn’t feel any signs of “home-coming”, rather emptiness, disconnection, a level of separation perhaps.

“Mummy look, the fields look different than the ones in Hungary. I like it, it’s pretty.” My five-year-old daughter suddenly comments in the back of the car to break the silence and I smile.

Karlovy Vary – the love, the play, the surrealness

We make our way in one go to Karlovy Vary, my home town, to reunite with my dad, my brother & my sister and her English family that we haven’t seen for close to four years. It feels surreal. Despite a potential language barrier, the children waste no time on chit-chatting and dive into play and play until the very last moment of our time together.

My dad stressing, trying to be a good host. This is a first family gathering of its kind and so everyone feels on some level awkward but everyone finds peace in watching our little girls play.

I am seeing the paintings I’ve painted more than 10 years ago hanging in my brother’s room – that’s his favourite he says & a memory of how I painted it appears. Wow, so many things happened since.

• 

• 

Cut – time to go to Prague

After a few days there we head to Prague to reunite with Mom. We jump on a tram and it takes me literally no time to start tearing.

It’s the same woman’s voice announcing next stations that I’ve heard so many times and it all starts coming up …

All kinds of memories, good and “bad”, of my university times,

night outs, my first jobs, meeting my husband, welcoming Grétie to this world,

it’s all there …

Why the hell was I thinking it wouldn’t be?! I look back to Gabor in tears and he nods in understanding. Yes, a lot of things happened for us here.

OK I finally admit to myself – Prague, I feel you. We have a connection.

We’ve always had. Thank you for letting me figure that out & proving me wrong!

Soul meeting with my Soul clients

On a morning before our last day I make my way to a coffee place I used to love and was about to close down when we were moving away. Now it’s up & running again.

I am walking there excited to meet some of the Souls I’ve had the honour to call my clients, for the first time in person and finally be able to hug them.

And so, I do, hug, squeeze, laugh, feel their energies, enjoy the conversations about growth, success, manifestation, alignment … so much blessing & connection, transmuting nervousness into excitement.

Gratitude. In love again with them. Making a decision right there – yes, I will host a retreat.

The time has come & I cannot wait to create a top-notch live experience I can pour my entire heart & Soul to.

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And then it’s time to go

And honestly, I can imagine staying for longer. Departs & saying goodbye are only getting more challenging for me as I am getting older. We pack up into the car & set the navigation to our current home that is now in Hungary, sweet Hungary. <3

Has divine timing ever failed you? Me, never. And so on our way we get a phone call confirming that we now have a land to build our home on in the sweetest place in Hungary. Eeeek!!!!

We’ll be back soon for more, Prague! Look for us! But for now – here’s to new beginnings & creating homes where our hearts are right now.

In January 2022, I wondered:

“How much fun could it possibly be to challenge myself to record a few seconds of my day every day and then sit back and enjoy watching such a capsule of my month?!”

And so inspired by Cassidy, I decided to stop wondering and just do it.

So I went ahead, shared it in my Stories, invited a few other wonderful Souls to join the challenge, and well …

I did it!

Here’s the result. Raw. Authentic. Real.

Enjoy having a genuine peek into my life & let me know if we have something in common!

PS: Next year, I am totally doing it again.

Sometimes in my work with clients I meet with an approach:

“This can only be this way because …”

“You can only succeed in this field if you do …”

“You cannot do something which is not following / in regulation with …”

 
Beliefs

Beliefs. Beliefs that are often so much rooted inside of us that it can be very difficult (but not impossible!) to question them, left alone change them, even if there are countless examples of how things CAN happen in another way.

You can live with a belief and hold on to it so tightly that it will manifest in your body in a form of a disease, such as beliefs:

“I am not good enough as I am.”

“I am now worthy.”

“I don’t deserve good. / I deserve to feel bad.”

 
Why do we hold on to beliefs so much?

The answer is simple. We have created beliefs in our system to feel safe. Beliefs are meant to keep us safe because what feels safe is what we know. It makes us feel even safer if we know that we share our beliefs with others, our relatives, friends, society. Therefore, the fear of unknown is something totally normal. It is not in the safe “known” ground and so it is an existential based fear.

But let me tell you something very important.

It’s an illusion. Not the fear, the fear is real. But sticking to our old beliefs hoping that we will remain in the safe place is an illusion. It’s not real and especially when our “safe” environment is not safe at all but it’s actually malicious to us, causing damage to our mental and physical health.

In my mentoring and healing practice, I have met with people desperately trying to keep their old beliefs which were causing actual physical harm to them. So, let’s think now – is sticking to old malicious beliefs a form of masochism?

 
Is sticking to old malicious beliefs a form of masochism?

Yes, I believe it is indeed.

The question is, do you want to keep hurting yourself with trying to hold on to some beliefs that are actually hurting you?

And while we are at it. Are you ready to consider that the beliefs are not hurting you themselves but it’s how YOU interpret them towards yourself? And if you don’t like the interpretation because it’s numbing you, stopping you from following your dreams or doubting the importance of your existance, you always have the power over deciding which beliefs you want to store in your system and which you don’t?

Yes, sometimes we need to do some trauma work and healing to help release and dissolve an unwanted belief, but you can ALWAYS decide whether you want to keep that belief or not any longer and then make steps towards changing it. It IS in your power, my dear, may you be 14, 35, or 70 years old.

 
Do things happen to you?

And I am going to drop another bomb here.

Are you ready to re-assess the belief that “things happen to you” as the truth is that things just happen?

They don’t happen to you, they don’t happen to anyone else, they just happen. YOU give the meaning to them. YOU interpret how they make you feel. YOU decide whether they are good or bad. Their essence is really empty and If it rains today, it rains today. It’s neither good or bad, on it’s own. It’s how you interpret it – what you make it mean TO YOU.

Do we create our own reality then? Of course we do, constantly – we create what things MEAN to us.

And the actual things that happen in our physical reality? Well, if you follow the guidance of your Soul, work on understanding and releasing your traumas (yes, we all have them), take steps, little or big, back to Your True Self, You can expect experiencing a lot of joy – and you’re likely going to interpret these as highly pleasant.

PS: Need a compassionate hand with understanding and transforming some of your beliefs to experience more joy and lightness in your life? Let’s have a look at them together, shall we? 💕